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UK Premier Sunak’s Losing His Marbles, But They Will Keep Greece’s

Words you never hear: “Hey, let’s go get some English food.”

What, no kidney pie takers? You can find it in the 1-page book of famous British recipes, right under Bedfordshire Clangers, Blood Pudding, and Faggots.

No #hateyou hashtags please because that’s a real English dish (not to be confused with a film noir femme fatale) of meatballs made from the waste parts of butchered meat, like pig’s heart, liver, and fatty belly meat. Yum for scum.

With alleged food like that, the British have also longed for a culture of their own but, not really having one, have for centuries stolen it from former colonies or used emissaries in other countries – Lord Elgin stealing the Parthenon Marbles.

Those have been for 200 years in the British Museum, which really should be called the Stolen Artifacts Museum, the British having little to house there worth looking at unless someone leaves a piece of kidney pie on the floor.

You’d think that British Prime Minister Rishi Sunak – of Indian descent – would understand that, given his ancestor’s homeland was long occupied by the British, but he’s been Anglicized so much he thinks Gandhi is a British food.

He has a heart harder than Stonehenge – the pile of rocks the British think are its Parthenon – but given his disapproval ratings in his short tenure he likely won’t be around long enough to snub Greek Premier Kyriakos Mitsotakis again.

Sunak dissed Mitsotakis, who was in London and gave an interview with the BBC pushing for return of the stolen Marbles, comparing the British Museum keeping them to the Mona Lisa being cut in half and displayed in two countries.

Heads of State meet to talk over potential conflicts like war, but Sunak thought that Mitsotakis daring to bring up the subject of the Marbles was so offensive he refused to meet with him. That’s it. Greece should at least ban kidney pie.

Maybe Sunak was still irritated by someone stealing his lunch money in a fourth grade schoolyard or that he’s getting more disrespect than the late Henry Kissinger at a Reunite Cyprus meeting.

The Marbles are never going to be returned, of course, and the petulant Sunak just highlighted the real deep-seated British scorn of Greeks, perhaps jealous that Greek food is the world’s best and British food is, well, it’s not food now, is it?

It’s hard to joust on high horses or take the moral high ground in a swamp, where Sunak put both his feet after taking them out of his mouth, although we can thank him for giving us some good chuckles about the idiot-syncrasies of the Brits.

Mitsotakis told reporters he was “deeply disappointed by the abrupt cancellation” of a meeting with Sunak, a fellow Conservative, planned for over lunch but if the Greek leader got a look at the menu he probably would have bailed first.

“Those who firmly believe in the correctness and justice of their positions are never hesitant to engage in constructive argumentation and debate,” Mitsotakis said, Greek officials adding that he was both “baffled” and “annoyed.”

Adding to the pettiness after even British politicians said of Sunak – “I say, old chum, it’s just not done” – he having none of the manners or menace of John Steed, or Emma Peel, the second-string Premier piled on his piddling stance.

Not prefacing his statement with the obligatory “Ya na nanna na na” he said that Mitsotakis promised not to talk about the stolen Marbles and went too far in giving an interview with the BBC, although there weren’t any reports yet that Sunak stomped his feet and held his breath after he said it.

Sunak said that, “it was clear that the purpose of the meeting was not to discuss substantive issues for the future, but rather to grandstand and relitigate issues of the past,” which Greece denied, so somebody’s lying here.

Lord Vaizey, who chairs the advisory board of the Parthenon Project dedicated to returning the Parthenon Marbles – they’re not the Elgin Marbles – said that the diplomatic row was unnecessary, although it’s tawdry.

The ex-culture minister said: “It is tied up to a certain extent in the traditional culture wars, where anyone who dares to say that British history wasn’t perfect is somehow unpatriotic.”

Mitsotakis was offered a meeting with an underling, which he properly rejected or he would have been greeted in Greece with a giant, collective “Na!” and tarred and feathered and run out of town on a rail. “Don Corleone, sorry can’t meet you, but the cook is available” wasn’t going to work.

Professor Irene Stamatoudi, a former member of the advisory committee for the Greek Minister of Culture, said the row “makes Rishi Sunak look no better than Lord Elgin,” and said the diplomat thief wanted the marbles to decorate his country house in Scotland.

Elgin said he had the permission of the ruling Ottoman Empire, which didn’t own them, and which has been cited by the British Museum as proof the stolen treasures were legally obtained, in what comes under British Injustice.

Mitsotakis has unfortunately clouded Greece’s argument by saying he’s not talking about a return but a “re-unification,” which smells like he’s open to a loan the museum offered, as long as Greece gives up ownership rights.

If that happened, it would be the Greek people snubbing him.

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