Having already emasculated the 96-pound weaklings of the Eunuch Union like he was wielding a Burdizzo, Turkey's Sultan Recep Tayyip Erdogan thought he could do the same to Greek Premier Kyriakos Mitsotakis, who may look like a kid you can bully in the schoolyard and take his lunch money but he's got what they no longer have.
Mitsotakis, he of the privileged pedigree upbringing and Ivy League education, looks like Charles Atlas in dealing with Erdogan compared to the EU's foreign Chief, Spain's Josep Borrell, who should wear knee pads since he kneels to the Turkish leader so much.
Great. Greece needed Zorro to help with Erdogan and Spain put up Zero instead, who's wishy one day and washy the next but a heavyweight next to Charles “Ostrich” Michel, Belgium's former Premier and now head of the European Council.
He represents the 28 heads of state but don't stand between him and an exit when Erdogan – exempt from soft sanctions the EU imposed on Turkey for unlawfully drilling for energy in Cypriot waters – comes to Brussels, or you'll get trampled.
After a virtual meeting of EU foreign chiefs by teleconference, Mr. Zero put out a statement – that's how they operate in Brussels, with tweets and press releases to avoid the press as much as possible so they won't be questioned.
He said Turkey should withdraw “immediately” – they add quotes to make it sound tough – and Mr. Tough Guy added in no uncertain terms (alright, some were certain) that, Turkey's action “runs counter and undermines efforts to resume dialogue and negotiations, and to pursue immediate deescalation, which is the only path towards stability and lasting solutions.”
That's the kind of talk that will get you beaten up and your lunch money stolen, and Erdogan is already conducting war on Greece through other means, Mr. Clausewitz, and can win it without firing a shot in the seas or anywhere else if he unleashes a million or so more refugees and migrants on Greek islands.
Turkey is holding nearly four million who went there fleeing war and strife in their homelands, especially Afghanistan's perpetual war with everyone and the Syrian civil war, as well as economic migrants from sub-Saharan African and other countries.
Erdogan is helped in his war with Greece by the EU's sad sack sorry lot of failures from the Neville Chamberlain School of Diplomacy and Appeasement who think saying, “Yes, Mr. President” will work on him the way it does on U.S. President Psycho, his buddy. What we need here is someone from the Wilt Chamberlain School to slam dunk.
Erdogan's war with Greece includes sending fighter jets and warships to violate Greek airspace and waters while NATO's Secretary-Eunuch Jens “Jello” Stoltenberg admitted he won't interfere because he doesn't have the cojones for it.
Erdogan believes he can do just about whatever he wants, except against Mitsotakis, whose rapid response in shutting down the northern land border against Erdogan who tried to get 10,000 migrants across showed real mettle.
The EU imposed only kid glove sanctions on Turkey for drilling for oil and gas in Cypriot waters, exempting Erdogan so he can come to Brussels every so often for batting practice on weak-kneed politicians.
"The policy of appeasement and the messages of support are not enough to discourage Turkey from its illegal actions,” Cypriot government spokesman Kyriakos Koushios told reporters.
Mitsotakis moved fast to build an international alliance against Turkey who planned to drill off of Greek islands, sending the Navy to confront a Turkish energy vessel and 10 Turkish warships.
Former premier and Looney Left leader Alexis “Commodore” Tsipras, whose sea experience is limited to riding on rich people's yachts, deferred to Erdogan more than President Psycho but now wants Mitsotakis to play hardball.
And for all you staunch Greek-Americans and Hellenophiles who think the White House Whacko will stand up for Greece in a conflict and join hands with Mitsotakis, he won't.
He will hold hands tightly with Erdogan who should be glad he's not a woman because the Clueless-in-Chief would grab him you know where to get what he wants and would side with Turkey.
Psycho bragged that he's the one who has the Turkish leader's ear and other world leaders ask him to help out, said Turkey's state-run propaganda agency Anadolu.
“‘You’re the only one he’ll listen to. He doesn’t listen to us. You’re the only one’.”
“I don’t like saying this publicly, but it happens to be true. I get along with him and he listens,” he said, according to the report, which should be worrying to Greece and Greek-Americans about which way the U.S. would tilt in a conflict.
So if it comes to a real war, those of you out there who believe in a deity had better pray hard for Greece because Erdogan might start shooting for real and can ask for guidance in his prayers at the Aghia Sophia mosque.
President Psycho doesn't go to church except for photo ops but he doesn't need to because he has a direct line to God, he said, perhaps on Zoom unless he has Him on speed dial, hopefully not next to McDonald's.
If it comes to it, Erdogan will find Greece tougher than President Marshmallow and should remember Plato: “Only the dead have seen the end of war.”